i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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