is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
