you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
