Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
