just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize