I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
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