He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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