it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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