i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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