So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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