What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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