Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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