the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
How naked do you want me to be?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
