grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
The Olympian is in my bed
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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