my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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