and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Randomize