i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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