why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Come share oat with me in your robe
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
