I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm at about main and main street
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
