You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
