bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
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