He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize