Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
