That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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