My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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