The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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