He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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