I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
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