he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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