respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
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