Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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