her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
