That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.