you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
