just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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