I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Houston, we have a blender
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
that is very illegal...i love you.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
