so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
