I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
