Umm I'm too high to move.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
