i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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