I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Randomize
