I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize