Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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