he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize
