we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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