Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I forget how to act sober
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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