woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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