it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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