I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Randomize
