Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
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