oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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